Bulking Up

A little training each day helps you pump up your game at the bargaining table.Can dealmakers improve their negotiating chops through daily practice?

Listen. Any decent book on communication skills will tell you how truly difficult it is to be a good listener. It doesn’t come naturally. Pick somebody each day to practice on. Don’t interrupt; don’t judge; don’t go away on a mental holiday. You will almost always pick up great business intelligence when you really listen.

Learn to be a Good Conversationalist. Ask open-ended questions. The ones that cannot be answered with a simple “yes” or “no”. Hint: They begin with how, why, what, who, where or when. This is how to gauge your opponent’s vulnerabilities and ferret out their underlying interests.

Be Obnoxious to Someone. Find someone annoying to practice on. Being petulant and irascible has its time and place at the bargaining table. You won’t use this tool often, but it’s nice to have it on your belt. And this kind of role playing experience will give you great perspective when you invariably find yourself on the receiving end.

Continue Your Education. There are lots of great books on negotiation. Read one. No matter hoe experienced you are, you’ll probably learn a technique or two that’s either new or something you haven’t used in awhile. Find a situation to practice it. This is how to expand your repertoire.

Flinch and Make a Counteroffer. Flinch and make a counteroffer on purpose. Reaction time can be critical. So hone those haggling reflexes till they become second nature.Agree With Everything Someone Says.

Disagree with Everything Someone Says. How does it feel? What makes you edgy? How is the other person reacting? At what point are they getting torqued? Negotiation is give and take, push and pull. Being able to sense your own thermometer as well as the other guy’s is an advantage.

Make An Outrageous Demand. Sometimes dealmakers need to be aggressive and audacious. They need to move beyond their comfort zones and test the limits. Bluff. Bluff big time. Ask for the moon and the stars.

When a famous violinist was hailed as an overnight sensation, he said, “I practiced for 20 years, and now they call me a genius.” Do your daily deal making exercises, and someday, you too, will play your opponent like a Stradivarius.

When You Fail, Don’t Give Up

These people didn’t.

• R.H.Macy failed seven times before his store in New York caught on.
• Novelist John Creasey got 753 rejection slips before he published the first of his 564 books.
• Thomas Edison was thrown out of school in the early grades when the teachers decided he could not do the work.
• Harry S. Truman failed as a haberdasher.
• When Bob Dylan performed at a high school talent show, his classmates booed him off the stage.
• W. Clement Stone, successful insurance company executive and founder of Success magazine, was a high school drop out.